Super Double Coupon Day

16 01 2015

I went to the grocery store, recently, and it was like Black Friday at Macy’s. It was Super Double Coupon Day at the Harris Teeter where I do my grocery shopping. Is that like double secret probation (Animal House)? If I didn’t learn anything else, I learned this…never go shopping on Super Double Coupon Day, even if you’re a coupon shopper. Now, I’m not talking about Myra McThrifty who cut a couple of coupons out of the morning paper to save 40 cents on a bag of self-rising flour and a bottle of vanilla extract. I’m talking about serious couponers. I’m talking 4903about people who walk into the store with an empty wallet and a 3 inch 3-ring binder filled with plastic pocketed pages, each pocket stuffed with coupons, and then walk out an hour later with free groceries and ten bucks. Where do they get all these things? I don’t know but it’s obvious they have put a great deal of work into making preparations for this visit to the store. It must have taken hours just to cut them all out. I saw one lady wearing a wrist splint-probably had carpal tunnel syndrome from cutting coupons. And the coupons aren’t simply stuffed into the pockets of the pages. They’ve got them in some sort of logical order so when they come to an item on the shelf, they can flip right over to the page holding the appropriate coupon.


Well, the only thing worse than the crowds on Super Double Coupon Day is the carnage of near-empty shelves with only a box of DUZ detergent, soy milk and a few other things no one, not even a major league couponer, wants.


I love it when I get up to check-out and the cashier asks me if I found everything okay. I used to respond that I

wasn’t looking for everything. Then I began to notice that I never find everything I am looking for. Usually, it’s one, maybe two, items. On this day it was 6 items. That was half my list! It’s like walking into a store in the south an hour after the weatherman has predicted an inch of snow…every morsel of bread and every drop of milk is gone. The shelves are completely bare. Well, I have learned my lesson. If I ever walk into the store again and learn it’s Super Double Coupon Day, I’m going to turn right around and walk out. I’ll hit the 7-11 on the way home and pick up enough to get mama and me through the night.

Take no prisoners!

Take no prisoners!




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