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17 06 2011

Anyone who has ever raised a child knows you can’t turn your back on the little boogers for a second. You leave little Johnny alone just long enough to change Misty-Sue’s diaper and the next time you see him he’s wrapped himself in toilet paper from head to toe, dropped scissors down the toilet, emptied the sugar canister onto the kitchen floor, poured Hershey’s chocolate syrup on his head, and finger painted the dog blue. How can he do so much crap in just five minutes? It’s amazing!


Millions of people love jelly beans and one of the best-selling jelly beans in the world is the ever-popular Jelly Belly gourmet jelly beans with their brightly colored, eye-catching, bean-shaped logo and zillion and one gourmet flavors. The greatest president since Abraham Lincoln, Ronald Regan, made them popular.


Back in February my wife and I were in a drug store to pick out Valentine’s Day cards for our granddaughters. Well, actually she was doing the picking. All I do is wander around the store until she asks me to read what she has picked out. She then hands it to me seeking my approval. First, I’m not good at picking cards. Second, by the time she finally makes a selection, I’m so ready to leave that I’ll approve anything. So, I give it a quick glance, express my approval, and then she puts it back to look for something else. My wife picks out greeting cards like she’s playing solitaire-she has to study every card that’s visible.


Anyway, as I was wandering around the store, I came upon what I thought was a candy display. After closer inspection I could see I was wrong. What I thought was some type of Jelly Belly candy display, right beside the candy shelves, was in fact a full line of shampoo, “Deliciously scented bath & shower jell”, and Jelly Belly cologne spray with flavors such as Blueberry Muffin and Mango Pineapple Salsa.

Shower Jell-Have a sip!


mmmmmm...tastes so clean!

With these products on the bathroom shelf, or more likely, the side of the tub (if you can find room around the wife’s abundance of shampoo bottles), what’s a child going to think? What’s a child going to do? That’s right-open, smell, and then drink. Yet on the label of each of these fruity flavored, candy-looking, tantalizing toiletries, it clearly states to keep away from children. These personal hygiene products, like any other, are not intended to be taken internally. And you certainly wouldn’t want your three-year old swigging it or the next time you turn your back on little Johnny, he may blowing butt bubbles.


For this brilliant idea, Jelly Belly, you get two thumbs down.




2 responses

17 06 2011
Melissa Weisbard

Sometimes you have to wonder what they are thinking when they manufacture things like this. They want kids to buy it, but they don’t want them to drink it. If it smells like fruit, kids assume it will taste like fruit. It’s just like the cigarette companies who made cigarettes laced with fruit flavors. Who would buy these but kids. Yet they claim they aren’t marketed for children … yeah right.

I enjoyed reading your blog post. You and I work for the same company (in different offices, obviously). I’m in the Louisville office. I’m also a blogger. I am an amateur photographer and I have a blog that showcases my photos and my rantings about life and politics and whatever else I feel like talking about. I heard that you wrote a Christian book. What is the title?

18 06 2011
Bill Taylor

You’re so right, Melissa. You have to wonder where their heads are when they come up with such creations and then display them by the candy-a kid magnet! I look forward to seeing more of your pictures and reading your rants.

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